One can argue that even if the decisions we make are fear based, we are still making a choice by making that decision. In other words, even if it’s a choice out of fear, it’s still a choice; but that’s not what this quote is about.

Whenever we make decisions, and behave in ways that are driven by fear, we are no longer in control, we are no longer feeling that we have a choice, we are no longer operating with integrity, and we are no longer demonstrating authenticity.

Decisions that are fear based are emotional, and therefore, irrational. They are driven by the need to survive instead of the desire to thrive, which would shift the impact of these decisions dramatically.

When we make a fear-based decision, we feel forced to make it; we feel like we have no choice. It feels like an internal coercion.

A fear-based decision contaminates intention by forcing us to fixate on threat avoidance; it clouds are judgment, and hinders our progress.

Before making a decision, ask yourself:”Is it fear based?”, and if the answer is “yes.”, delay making it until you dissolve the fear linked to it, or until you find an alternative decision that is not fear based.

-Sam Qureshi

There are five ways that we can use to handle our negative thoughts:

1. Focusing on serving others:
By focusing on helping others, we won’t have time to focus on our own negative thoughts about ourselves. This is a form of distraction; it can help, but it doesn’t solve the problem.

2. Taking progressive action of any kind:
By focusing on doing, we would be too distracted to focus on thinking. Any progressive action can help, but the most effective ones are the ones related to the negative thoughts themselves. In other words, if the actions can help address or resolve the negative thoughts specifically, that can help reduce their intensity, but it doesn’t solve the problem.

3. Journaling:
Journaling is a powerful tool to empty our minds, and temporarily release our negative thoughts on a daily basis, but it doesn’t solve the problem.

4. Reframing:
Through role play, dialogue, and visualization, we can directly engage with our negative thoughts to understand them and reframe them. That can help lower their intensity, but it doesn’t solve the problem.

5. Dissolving the negative emotions that gave birth to the negative thoughts in the first place:
All previous ways focus on the negative thoughts instead of their origin. They are helpful, but they don’t provide a permanent solution; they only provide a way to manage the existing problem. However, by dissolving the negative emotions that created the negative thoughts, we are permanently eliminating them.

-Sam Qureshi